Do you tell new partners, and when?
A sensitive one. For those in the dating world, how and when do you bring it up? Trying to figure out the right approach.
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Protecting my lips before skiing changed everything for me.
Reflected sun is sneaky, it got me on holiday last year.
I usually wait until things feel like they're actually going somewhere, then bring it up on a calm evening when I'm not mid outbreak, and honestly every time I've been terrified it has gone so much better than the version in my head.
I told my current partner on our third date, mostly because I was tired of dreading the conversation more than the actual outbreaks, and he just shrugged and said his mom gets them too. Honestly the buildup in my head was so much worse than the thirty seconds it actually took.
I usually bring it up before things get physical, just in a calm moment when we're talking, and honestly every partner I've told has been way more understanding than the version of the conversation I rehearsed in my head. The dread of telling is almost always worse than the actual telling.
I used to wait until things felt "serious" but honestly that just made it a bigger deal in my head than it ever was for them, so now I mention it early and casually, usually before we get to kissing, and every single person so far has basically shrugged and said they probably already have it anyway.
Great question, and you are not alone with this. Catching the trigger early is where most of the difference comes from.